Rochelle Zahacy wrote: ↑3 years agoFirst of all HUGE hugs. I though you were just shrugging it off like a champ.
I absolutely love your Roughian adventure. I was told a few months ago I might be being treated this way because my happy excited posts seem like bragging. Which let a ton of air out of my share-tank. Since then it definitely seems like when someone is having success(and/or fun) and want to tell the (SIM) world about it, some people react like it’s bragging or rubbing others’ noses in it.
I’ve thought numerous times about making a post for all my favourite things happening in my barn right now, and share it with anyone who will listen! But I haven’t built up the course because I haven’t wanted to deal with what you’ve been going through.
I’ve also thought about making a post where people can share babies they breed and explain what excites them about the foal! But again I feel like it would just be me getting SUPER excited about every baby I breed. I feel I have no one who really gets my excitement about every tiny thing. Some days I feel like I could burst if I can’t talk about something I did or that happened, which is part of the reason I made the Mini Brag post to keep me from exploding from SIM loneliness
I tangented and I’m sorry. I absolutely LOVE hearing people’s success stories. Dash losing in a photo finish (for the second time) behind Atahollan actually hurt a lot less after Pete posted in the Mini Brags thread about that being his fourth attempt at the Chimbo. I’m a SIM baby, and people’s success stories give me so much hope, at least on days that I’m not in a pit of despair about how there is no way I’ll be able to achieve X, Y, or Z
My meds have clearly worn off, and my first day at a new job with less than 5 hours of sleep has cause my brain to no longer be able to come to the point naturally...
Share your happy success stories. Or else.
Where’s my Luna Meme when I need it!
Please keep sharing and being excited. Maybe there is a way where the trolls don't need to read or comment? This is coming from someone who has been told multiple times that my attempts to promote my stallion are "stupid", even though he was a gift to me and I am trying to do my best both by him and the giver.
There ought to be a place where we can share stories about our horses, even claiming horses, and have fun with that. And be excited about our goofy foals. And promote our $10k stallions. Or whatever else. Chat is out, and here we just get the energy vampires 24/7.
simperior edge
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- Kelly Haggerty
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Re: simperior edge
- Dylan Christensen
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Re: simperior edge
This might open up a whole new wound here, sorry I’m advance.
I am truly sorry for some of the things I’ve done and how I’ve spoken to people and I know others that have echoed similar sentiments are also truly sorry. However, some of the people that those negative interactions came with were not always entirely innocent and I think as a community we need to see both sides of the coin.
While there were plenty of times I needlessly went after someone in a forum post, it also has happened to me. On one specific occasion I had someone come at me personally which led to a thread lock, I don’t care so much about that but, they followed me into my DMs and continued to antagonize me thereafter over a very sensitive subject I regrettably shared.
While what I did thereafter to this person wasn’t justifiable I will say I am someone who holds grudges and since they hurt me I tried to do the same to them.
Like I said, I’m not trying to justify what I did, it was wrong, but sometimes there is more to it and all of us should try to see that more often.
I am truly sorry for some of the things I’ve done and how I’ve spoken to people and I know others that have echoed similar sentiments are also truly sorry. However, some of the people that those negative interactions came with were not always entirely innocent and I think as a community we need to see both sides of the coin.
While there were plenty of times I needlessly went after someone in a forum post, it also has happened to me. On one specific occasion I had someone come at me personally which led to a thread lock, I don’t care so much about that but, they followed me into my DMs and continued to antagonize me thereafter over a very sensitive subject I regrettably shared.
While what I did thereafter to this person wasn’t justifiable I will say I am someone who holds grudges and since they hurt me I tried to do the same to them.
Like I said, I’m not trying to justify what I did, it was wrong, but sometimes there is more to it and all of us should try to see that more often.
yeah
- Carole Hanson
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Re: simperior edge
To clarify, I genuinely am sorry for bringing Kelly into it. Like I’ve said to her privately, it was response from me where I felt people were jumping onto hate at just a few players and no one else was being held accountable.Kelly L Haggerty wrote: ↑3 years ago I don't want to bring Kelly into this, I have no beef with her. But if we're talking double standards, just the other day she mocked a player selling a mare for a high price and when someone expressed their distaste about it she continued on the defensive and then it turned into a mess of who can outdo who in the petty department. Please don't act like it's just a small group of people in the SIM that are the black sheep and everyone else is lovely dovey kind and supportive. I'm sure tons of s**t gets said about various players between all sorts of people in the game, human nature. What goes on in private can stay in private and I can't fault people for that.
Ok, I dealt with this in private with the author of the post, but since it keeps coming up I will deal with it publicly. I never intended to mock the player. My mistake right off the bat was that I thought his original post was humor, and not a legit attempt to sell the horse. This is because the price was higher than any from the auction, quite a bit more than he paid, and he revealed that she was a star and not a hen. So I posted to follow in kind, offering to sell my mares for high prices as well, saying nothing about either him nor his mare. The continued postings to me were just carrying on what I thought was a running joke. It was a mistake on my part that was perceived as bullying. And I will admit that perception is reality in these cases, so I will publicly apologize, as I did privately to the impacted player, where we talked the situation through.
And while we are on the subject, just to clear the air altogether, I don't care if anyone pinhooks and I don't care what you sell horses for or how much you pay. If I see predatory behavior aimed specifically at new players I am going to find that offensive, but that did not apply in this case and at no time was I upset nor did I disapprove of the player selling his horse, nor the price.
With Kelly’s clarification here and context given, I was able to see her side of the story and I can see how things could have been misinterpreted or misjudged.
I think it would be nice for others to also have the opportunity to explain and clarify. Not to deflect and excuse behaviour. Just make things clear.
And just a final point to add about sharing favourite horses. Yes it does annoy me at times I admit, I gripe about it to people privately but wouldn’t do it on the forum because it’s just easier to ignore the post altogether and move on. I’m sure there’s been times when I’ve bragged about something and someone has rolled their eyes at my post. That’s fine, I’ll continue bragging whenever I achieve something cool because I’m competitive and I like to share my achievements whether it annoys people or not. I’ll also continue to ignore it and move on if it annoys me when someone else does it. Hypocritical of me? Yes, you can blame that on my competitiveness and wanting to constantly outdo others. Doesn’t mean I’m not happy for other people’s success though, just not always (like when I get beat in the process lol).
- The Harlequins
- Eclipse Champion
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Re: simperior edge
I've had the pack smell blood a couple of times.
water of a ducks back to me.
water of a ducks back to me.
The closest a person ever comes to perfection is when he fills out a job application form.
- Mr. Lord Rich
- Hall of Fame
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- Location: San Diego, CA
Re: simperior edge
Time heals all.
Xander and I are practically best buds now. Well not really, but we don't * at each other any more and actually have worked out some deals in the past couple seasons.
I wise person once told me to take a 2nd look at your post before you press send, not to edit for typos, but instead look at it and think how the other person will feel about what you just said and if you think it will make them feel like *, you probably should not post it.
Xander and I are practically best buds now. Well not really, but we don't * at each other any more and actually have worked out some deals in the past couple seasons.
I wise person once told me to take a 2nd look at your post before you press send, not to edit for typos, but instead look at it and think how the other person will feel about what you just said and if you think it will make them feel like *, you probably should not post it.
A CAVAL DONATO NON SI GUARDA IN BOCCA
- Nick Gilmore
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Re: simperior edge
Xander is definitely an acquired taste, lol. Otherwise, good advice.Pete Vella wrote: ↑3 years ago Time heals all.
Xander and I are practically best buds now. Well not really, but we don't * at each other any more and actually have worked out some deals in the past couple seasons.
I wise person once told me to take a 2nd look at your post before you press send, not to edit for typos, but instead look at it and think how the other person will feel about what you just said and if you think it will make them feel like *, you probably should not post it.
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- Sprinter
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Re: simperior edge
I would just like to say, in my view,
I think the way that The Steward has brought this difficult and touchy subject to the fore has been spot on !
No dictates from up on high, but with a gentle public nudge and a push, and watch the players discuss.
It even made me submit a post,
happy racing all !!
I think the way that The Steward has brought this difficult and touchy subject to the fore has been spot on !
No dictates from up on high, but with a gentle public nudge and a push, and watch the players discuss.
It even made me submit a post,
happy racing all !!
- Mara Jade Vess
- Miler
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- Joined: 5 years ago
- Location: Alberta
Re: simperior edge
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking over the past few days on this subject. This is gonna be pretty scatterbrained, sorry not sorry.
I hear a lot about how great this community is, how generous and welcoming they are, and so on. Having been in communities with similar interests, I’ve seen first-hand how they can go toxic. I’ve met some genuinely good people through this game, including one who has been dragged in this very thread (and let me just say, none of you see what goes on behind-the-scenes, so maybe show some of this compassion and empathy others have preached about). However, the community at large is something I’ve always been wary about. When I joined, I was terrified to post on the forum or go into chat because I saw the way some users spoke on the forum and decided that no way, no chance am I interacting with them. In some ways, not much has changed – posting my side projects for example have not exactly been a pleasant experience mentally because I second-guess and think that no one will care, look at me like I'm just doing these things for attention, and/or think lesser of me because I spent hours on researching a part of the game that in reality has no value or effect to how people play. It likely put me far behind in my advancement in the SIM as I didn’t reach out for help for months, and by that point, my trial by fire was mostly concluded and I was out of the new player-restricted tracks. I wonder how many had a similar experience and left because of it. Now knowing that new players are being warned about others? That is very sad. I’ve been snarked at, talked down to, made to feel ashamed. And shockingly, many, if not all, of those interactions took place in a public setting when I was a newer player, and, even more shockingly, they were not carried out by this fabled group of bullies. Lovely.
I guess I’ll have to step back for a while and decide if this is a game and community that I wish to be apart of going forward.
I hear a lot about how great this community is, how generous and welcoming they are, and so on. Having been in communities with similar interests, I’ve seen first-hand how they can go toxic. I’ve met some genuinely good people through this game, including one who has been dragged in this very thread (and let me just say, none of you see what goes on behind-the-scenes, so maybe show some of this compassion and empathy others have preached about). However, the community at large is something I’ve always been wary about. When I joined, I was terrified to post on the forum or go into chat because I saw the way some users spoke on the forum and decided that no way, no chance am I interacting with them. In some ways, not much has changed – posting my side projects for example have not exactly been a pleasant experience mentally because I second-guess and think that no one will care, look at me like I'm just doing these things for attention, and/or think lesser of me because I spent hours on researching a part of the game that in reality has no value or effect to how people play. It likely put me far behind in my advancement in the SIM as I didn’t reach out for help for months, and by that point, my trial by fire was mostly concluded and I was out of the new player-restricted tracks. I wonder how many had a similar experience and left because of it. Now knowing that new players are being warned about others? That is very sad. I’ve been snarked at, talked down to, made to feel ashamed. And shockingly, many, if not all, of those interactions took place in a public setting when I was a newer player, and, even more shockingly, they were not carried out by this fabled group of bullies. Lovely.
I guess I’ll have to step back for a while and decide if this is a game and community that I wish to be apart of going forward.
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Re: simperior edge
I’m pretty sure I was a * to Pete once on here. It was probably my fault, can’t remember. Sorry Pete.
I’ve been here (uh...off and on ) since 2006. My experience has been that this community has far less bullying/conflict/whatever than any other online gathering of people I’ve ever seen, and it isn’t particularly close. I don’t chat, maybe that’s where it happens.
This comes up every so often and I’m always surprised by it. Part of me kinda misses the old days when we’d just tear each other apart on the forum then go shoot the sh@t in chat. Seems like a century or so ago....I think most of that crew is gone now.
I’ve been here (uh...off and on ) since 2006. My experience has been that this community has far less bullying/conflict/whatever than any other online gathering of people I’ve ever seen, and it isn’t particularly close. I don’t chat, maybe that’s where it happens.
This comes up every so often and I’m always surprised by it. Part of me kinda misses the old days when we’d just tear each other apart on the forum then go shoot the sh@t in chat. Seems like a century or so ago....I think most of that crew is gone now.
- Mr. Lord Rich
- Hall of Fame
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- Joined: 11 years ago
- Location: San Diego, CA
Re: simperior edge
No worries Kevin I don't even recall so it prob was nothing. Also the good old days haha, Very entertaining to say the least.Kevin Hern wrote: ↑3 years ago I’m pretty sure I was a * to Pete once on here. It was probably my fault, can’t remember. Sorry Pete.
I’ve been here (uh...off and on ) since 2006. My experience has been that this community has far less bullying/conflict/whatever than any other online gathering of people I’ve ever seen, and it isn’t particularly close. I don’t chat, maybe that’s where it happens.
This comes up every so often and I’m always surprised by it. Part of me kinda misses the old days when we’d just tear each other apart on the forum then go shoot the sh@t in chat. Seems like a century or so ago....I think most of that crew is gone now.
A CAVAL DONATO NON SI GUARDA IN BOCCA
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Re: simperior edge
After reading all these posts I just have to get this off my chest. Pete V, I will never forget the time I trained a yearling FREAK into INJURY and when I posted that fact here you laughed, LAUGHED at my post.. My poor horsie, hurt and forever nothing but a blue hen mare poppin out stakes and freaks without a chance to run through my negligence when I needed a shoulder to cry on all I got was amusement at my misfortune.. I almost quit the game for 22.46 seconds.. but then I got over it.. So its all ok, I will survive.. Gloria Gaynor you are timeless!!!
- Mr. Lord Rich
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Re: simperior edge
I'm sorry i laughed at you Art. I am not the same person I was when I first started.Art Kage wrote: ↑3 years ago After reading all these posts I just have to get this off my chest. Pete V, I will never forget the time I trained a yearling FREAK into INJURY and when I posted that fact here you laughed, LAUGHED at my post.. My poor horsie, hurt and forever nothing but a blue hen mare poppin out stakes and freaks without a chance to run through my negligence when I needed a shoulder to cry on all I got was amusement at my misfortune.. I almost quit the game for 22.46 seconds.. but then I got over it.. So its all ok, I will survive.. Gloria Gaynor you are timeless!!!
Although part of me wants to laugh right now as you bring this up, but i will not, promise.
A CAVAL DONATO NON SI GUARDA IN BOCCA
- Rebecca Rose Hepburn
- Hall of Fame
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- Joined: 17 years ago
Re: simperior edge
Bullies who were not mentioned in this thread don't get some kind of free pass. If someone bullied you when you were a newbie then they're still part of the problem.Mara Jade Vess wrote: ↑3 years ago I’ve been snarked at, talked down to, made to feel ashamed. And shockingly, many, if not all, of those interactions took place in a public setting when I was a newer player, and, even more shockingly, they were not carried out by this fabled group of bullies. Lovely.
A horse is the projection of peoples' dreams about themselves - strong, powerful, beautiful - and it has the capability of giving us escape from our mundane existence.- Pam Brown
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Re: simperior edge
I was almost ok until I read your last sentence.. go ahead, laugh Pete, you see Chuckles would want you to, remember, a little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down my pants! You are cruel beyond belief and I wish you A GOOD DAY SIR!Pete Vella wrote: ↑3 years agoI'm sorry i laughed at you Art. I am not the same person I was when I first started.Art Kage wrote: ↑3 years ago After reading all these posts I just have to get this off my chest. Pete V, I will never forget the time I trained a yearling FREAK into INJURY and when I posted that fact here you laughed, LAUGHED at my post.. My poor horsie, hurt and forever nothing but a blue hen mare poppin out stakes and freaks without a chance to run through my negligence when I needed a shoulder to cry on all I got was amusement at my misfortune.. I almost quit the game for 22.46 seconds.. but then I got over it.. So its all ok, I will survive.. Gloria Gaynor you are timeless!!!
Although part of me wants to laugh right now as you bring this up, but i will not, promise.
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Re: simperior edge
this is what happens when im not in chat for the past little bit eh the chatroom has become some lawless place fillied with the underbelly of the sim .