I stilll exist

[Noel Collins]

just san update since I know I have been gone most of this sim year. Between getting my kiddos through a uncomfortable pregnancy, a newborn grand baby(gorgeous and cuddly), catching covid(that just really sucked, and now a legal battle i've been a bit busy and neglecting the barn. I have managed to get in and enter a horse every couple weeks but that's been about it. watch for an auction. i've got horses that need to go.

[Stormy Peak]

Congrats on the the grand-baby : )
Glad you recovered from the covid, and I hope the legal battle swings your way.

I hope you will be able to find more time to play the Sim in the near future.

Stormy

[Darcy McBride]

I hate to hear all the troubles you have been dealing with, but very happy you have a new, healthy grandchild! If you need some help with your stable, let me know; I'll be glad to lend a hand until you have the peace and time to do it.

[Noel Collins]

The legal will be a battle. This is a bit of a rant.
It all started a week ago Saturday. The baby was running a fever and was vomitting, so we took her to urgent care. Since her temp was over 100 we were told to take her immediately to the children's er. Big metro area. Highly respected Er. We drove straight there. Got back into a room immediately. At this point we had dressed and undressed her three times and both legs and arms were moving fine and were normal sized. Its Minnesota in winter. Many many layers of clothing taken off and put on. Everything on her is perfect but for fever and vommitting. They ran a blood, urine, and stool. White counts were high so they wanted to do a spinal/lumbar tap. We agreed. They made us leave the room. We came back and she was acting "off". A bit later the nurse commented she seemed to be in pain so they gave her Tylenol. Started antibiotics. She was admitted overnight. I left around 10pm. No swelling. Her dad stayed with her, he said the nurses were in and out all night checking on her and telling him to get some sleep. I was at home to take care of my daughter who had been running a fever for five days and was put on high dose antibiotics. Sunday morning my daughter and I get a call from her dad that her leg was now swollen and she didn't want her leg touched. The nurse let the docs know. The docs ordered an X-ray. We were old to get to the hospital. We got there and they tell us she has a broken femur. Her legs were fine when we were admitted to the er the day before. Doctors keep coming in and out with little explanation of anything. No one saying why her counts were high, what the vommitting is, how the hell her leg is now broken, no answers. Then we are told that with femur breaks its standard hospital policy to report the injury. "someone will probably come talk to you".
The next day I am back at work and the sheriff strolls in with cps and pulls a full bore crime scene investigation style interrogation on my daughter and her boyfriend. None of us know how she got injured. None of us did this. The three of us are her primary care givers, she has not been out of our site and pretty much lives on one of our shoulders except for the middle of the night when she is swaddled and in a bassinet. The parents are 16 and 17. Dad is half African American. My daughter is caucasian. No adults besides the investigators were with them interviewing. I was not even questioned at this point. So minor kids being screamed at and interrogated by social workers and sheriffs investigators about an injury to their child that they did not commit with no one in the room to advocate for them. Meanwhile i'm trying to find a lawyer to get advice and also trying to frantically drive there because the kids have called me in a panic not knowing what the heck is going on except that they are being accused of hurting their daughter.
I finally get there and the kids are in the hospital lobby sobbing. Alone. They were barely given a chance to say goodbye and told that their child is now in protective care and they have immediately lost custody of her. They refused to believe that we did not do this. The hospital refuses to let me run up and see her quick. They also would not release her medical records to us. The foster mom walks past us with a carseat to go to the room and get her, we ask to meet her so we can at least tell her what the baby likes, doesn't like, quirks, etc. Social worker stands in front of us and refuses (it turns out the foster mom got torqued at them for not letting her meet us at the hospital). it all continues to just get worse. The sheriffs rep ducked out of the hospital so that they couldn't interview me there (they wanted me on camera, so they could pull the same load of crap interviewing with me. slamming tables, yelling, intimidating, trying to get me to incriminate my kids and say they did this when they didn't. whole ball of *). We were able to get a hold of a lawyer, she immediately asked us what hospital and injury, then asked if it was a couple certain doctors. It was.
We still do not have our girl back and we have to go through the whole CPS process to get her back. Even though we are innocent this could take months. There is no proof we did this, we didn't do this, but we now are in a legal battle for her. We have been advised to play all their games and toe their lines. there are so many unanswered questions for us though. They aren't telling us what the process is besides that we are getting to see her for 1 hour three times a week. That the kids, who are damn good at caring for her, need to take parenting classes, mental health evaluations, and expose their entire lives to the court. that our whole family is being looked at and the sheriff wants us to take polygraphs and is trying to pursue criminal charges.
I'm shattered. a good chunk of my personal belief system is gone. I was raised in the justice system. My father was a cop and mom a teacher, I was brought up that living a decent life, being a good citizen, be honest, be kind to others, keep your hands to yourself and your own things and bad won't happen, has been utterly shattered. Im a cops kid raised to trust the system. The system that now has me so traumatized and enraged that I just don't know what to do. There's a complete lack of answers and I have no trust in any of them anymore. The hospital did this but they are beyond investigation. They've been prosecuted and lost for this before (I hired the lawyers that beat them). we told the sheriff to ask the hospital about the procedure. The doctor they asked insisted a broken leg isn't possible from it.......though this doctor has been part of doing this procedure breaking an infants leg in the past. Looks like those records are sealed. I'm just broken and I feel i've failed to protect my family like its my job to do.
We've had one trip to court already and have the next date scheduled. im already out 15k in lawyer fees and if it goes to criminal it will be more. I want justice for my family. This is so completely nuts. Mainly I just want my "snack pack" granddaughter back. It hurts so much walking past her things but not having her here. Comforting my daughter when all I want to do is curl into a ball and sob myself. Packing a bag with some of her clothes, pinkies, and a couple blankets so she has something of home we can droop off to her foster at the first visitation. I broke down packing the bag tonight. Its just so so wrong.

[Flizan Hambletonian]

Oh. I'm so sorry... I really hope everything works out quickly for you all... <3 I

[Stormy Peak]

Seems like the hospital should be on the line for not having cameras set up in a situation where they are doing a procedure on a baby where in the past a baby did have a leg broke while under going the same thing. ???

You(your family) are having to prove you didn't do it, but the hospital doesn't have to prove they didn't do it either?

I know this might be a super long shot thing....and I wish I could remember the details...but a long time ago I saw a crime show where parents were accused of breaking their baby's bones...and claimed they were never rough with their baby. It seems the baby while at the hospital had another bone get broke. Turns out the baby had a genetic situation. I looked it up and it said that it's about 1 in 20,000 babies have various degrees of this condition from mild to severe. The parents in the true crime show were exonerated once the condition was discovered in the baby.

This is what it was:
--------------
Osteogenesis imperfecta (OI) is an inherited (genetic) bone disorder that is present at birth. It's also known as brittle bone disease. A child born with OI may have soft bones that break (fracture) easily, bones that are not formed normally, and other problems. Signs and symptoms may range from mild to severe.
--------------

I'm so sorry you are all going through all of this I hope your lawyer can get all of this resolved for you as soon as possible.
Will the court allow video (zoom) contact with the baby in-between any days when you are allowed real visits...just so the baby can hear your voices and see your faces. If they are worried about the child's safety...that would be a safe way of staying in contact with your grand-child between visits. ???

Also, don't feel like you failed anyone. This was Way beyond your control. It sounds like you are taking action and not just sitting on your thumbs just waiting to see how things go. Hang in there.

Stormy

[Darcy McBride]

My heart is breaking for you and your family. I pray the hospital will be held responsible for this. Stay strong and focused and know many of us are thinking and praying for you and your family, and for that precious granddaughter.

[Kelly Haggerty]

What a mess. I guess the right thing to do is listen to your lawyers but man, I would be so tempted to go to the media.

[Noel Collins]

It’s so tempting to go the media, post it on my Twitter and Instagram. I’ve resisted. Here I’m under a pseudonym so I can talk about it.

Once it’s resolved I will be.

[Lori Hamill]

Hard to imagine a worse situation, my heart goes out to you and your family. I can't even imagine how helpless you all must be feeling when you've done everything that you can possibly do. It is in the hands of your lawyer and the court system now and that alone is scary.
Hopefully there are enough pediatrician records, etc. showing how well your sweet little grandbaby has been taken care of all the way up to her entering that nightmare hospital. You all must be exhausted and mentally drained. As hard as it is to do - please try to be gentle and kind to yourselves, try to rest as much as you can and please don't feel guilty. I pray that all comes out well and quickly in the end and your grandbaby is back home as soon as possible and you can all start to put this horrible experience behind you.

[Lily Wilkins]

What a horrific situation. I am so sorry that you and your family are going through all of this, and I sincerely hope that hospital gets what is coming to them!!

[Cleo Patra]

*hugs*

[Noel Collins]

Thanks all. Her bone scans come out as normal so far. no other breaks, bruises, cuts, marks, etc. just the mystery broken bone. so no current sign of a genetic reason.
I guess its all guilty until you can somehow prove yourself innocent in our area. Even if we can prove we did not do this there is a chance we will still have to go through all the child protection rigamarole. We asked "When its proven we didn't do this, do we immediately get her back?", The social worker had no answer. I was going through all her legal court papers again today (I read then explain it all to my daughter, there isn't a class for this in high School) and it does not say we came in for fever and vommitting, just "came to er". The answers the deputies passed on to the court are so slanted and not showing the complete picture. For instance it states none of know how it happened but doesn't state that we said we noticed a difference in her after a medical procedure was performed. A doctor was spoken with but the nurse who examined her originally and was with us for 5 hours was not spoken with.
I can only hope that the video camera I saw on the ceiling at our first visitation was on and recording to show how well the kids dealt with their daughter crabbing and crying for the first half of their visitation. They are currently granted 3 visits of 1 hour a week. Not nearly enough for bonding with an infant, but that's what the county feels is enough.
I held her for about 30 seconds at the start and end of the visit. Im not having my daughter put her into the carseat to see her get whisked off again. I will take that pain for her. I think that baby still recognized me but she was so so mad.She misses us and is way too young to understand any of what's going on. She has been back to the doctor and hospitals multiple times in the week and a half she has been gone. still not eating right. in a lot of discomfort for the leg.
the foster mom is at least really great. She video chats with us with the baby, sends photos and updates almost daily. Little one is her 43rd placement in her care. She has a daycare in her home so is experienced and has everything she needs.its a little comfort but not much.
I really worry how this will affect the kids in the long run. From what Ive heard they could always be under suspicion now.

[Ash Tarasin]

I don't know what to say. I cannot even begin to fathom what you're going through right now. Warm thoughts to you and your family.

[Noel Collins]

We got news today from the sheriff that there won't be criminal charges placed on the kids. the sheriff says that they don't have enough proof to charge (hard to have proof when we didn't do it) They still are assuming guilt because they are the parents and this is a serious injury. So they are placing nastiness on their records for ten years. Ten years that would be detriment to future careers(b wants to be a dentist and t possibly a fire fighter). They wouldn't be able to pass any background checks during that time. So we will be doing an appeal to clear their records while also looking into malpractice against the hospital. In the meantime the sheriff also recommends the baby remain in foster care because even though they can't prove it they "think" they did it. So we are looking at possibly months without our girl back in the house.
meeting with lawyers Monday. Child protection court part 2 on Thursday.